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So I’m restructuring chapter 3. Too much introspection? Could very well be.
But I found this sentence:

Shaking her head, her hair flailing about as she chastised herself. Jas sure had managed to get under her in a hell of a hurry.

Guess what I left out?

It should be “Jas sure had managed to get under her skin in a hell of a hurry! Sheesh, I’m not writing erotica for crying out loud! This is what happens when I write at 2 a.m.

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3 Comments

  1. *giggling* I think I like the first version better. *giggle some more*

  2. The first one had definite possibilities :o)

    Sorry I wasn’t around for a few days, internet problems + been playing with my new toy! hehe

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